Supporting a Loved One Struggling with Hoarding
Hoarding disorder is a complex psychological condition that affects millions of people around the world. It significantly impacts not only the individual but also their family and friends. If you have a loved one who hoards, it’s important to approach the situation with empathy, understanding, and a commitment to supporting their journey towards recovery.
In this blog, we will discuss practical ways to support a family member or friend who hoards, offering guidance on fostering open communication, encouraging professional help, and creating a safe and supportive environment.
How to Support a Loved One Struggling with Hoarding
Educate Yourself
The first step in supporting someone who hoards is to educate yourself about hoarding disorder. Understand that hoarding is not simply a matter of disorganization or laziness but a complex mental health condition. Your loved one didn’t just decide to not clean one day. Learn about the causes, symptoms, and available treatment options. By gaining knowledge, you will be better equipped to approach the situation with empathy and patience. And you’re going to need empathy and patience.
Foster Open Communication
Approaching the topic of hoarding can be challenging, as it may trigger feelings of shame, embarrassment, or defensiveness. Here are some tips for fostering open and supportive communication:
Choose the right time and place
Find a calm and private setting where your loved one feels comfortable opening up. Avoid confrontational or judgmental tones. Make sure you’re not approaching the topic when you’re both heated, or in a heightened state.
Express concern and empathy
Use “I” statements to express your concerns without sounding accusatory. For example, say, “I’ve noticed that you seem overwhelmed by your belongings, and I’m concerned about your well-being.” This helps take the accusatory edge off.
Listen actively
If you’re communicating and they’re receptive to it, you need to be too. Give your loved one the opportunity to express their thoughts and emotions without interruption. Show understanding and validate their feelings, listen. Hoarding often cuts off people from their support networks, creating a vicious feedback loop of seclusion. If they are talking— let them talk.
Avoid criticism
Instead of focusing on the clutter or mess, emphasize your desire to help them improve their quality of life. Offer your support and remind them that you are there to assist them on their journey.
Encourage Professional Help
Hoarding disorder often requires professional intervention to address the underlying psychological factors and develop effective coping strategies. Gently suggest the idea of seeking help from a mental health professional who specializes in hoarding disorder. Here are some approaches to consider:
Offer information
Share resources, such as books, articles, or websites that discuss hoarding disorder and the benefits of professional intervention. Highlight success stories and positive outcomes. You can find resources online for assistance and support near you, just search “hoarding resources + [your county or city]” to find local support.
Accompany them to appointments
If your loved one agrees to seek professional help, offer to accompany them to therapy sessions or support groups. This gesture can provide comfort and encouragement during the process. Again, remember that the most crippling component of hoarding isn’t the room full of newspapers, its the shame and insecurity in the person’s mind. Helping them, accompany them to visits, helps fight that isolation.
Research local resources
Help your loved one find local therapists, support groups, or organizations that specialize in hoarding disorder. Provide them with contact information and encourage them to take the next steps. We mentioned this earlier, but it’s simple to do a search for “hoarding resources + [your county or city]” to find local support.
Establish Boundaries:
Supporting someone who hoards can be emotionally challenging, and it’s crucial to establish and maintain healthy boundaries to protect your own well-being. Here are some guidelines to consider:
Set limits
Clearly communicate what you are comfortable with regarding their hoarding behavior. For example, you may establish boundaries around entering their living space or participating in cleaning efforts.
Practice self-care
Caring for a loved one with hoarding disorder can be emotionally draining. Take time for yourself, engage in activities that bring you joy, and seek support from friends, support groups, or therapy.
Seek professional guidance for yourself
Consider seeking therapy or counseling for yourself to navigate the complex emotions and challenges associated with supporting someone who hoards.
Offer Practical Support:
While addressing the underlying psychological factors of hoarding requires professional help, there are ways you can provide practical support to your loved one:
Non-judgmental assistance
Offer your help without criticism or judgment. Be patient and understanding as they navigate the process of decluttering and organizing.
Break tasks into manageable steps
Help your loved one break down overwhelming tasks into smaller, more achievable goals. Offer assistance with sorting, organizing, and disposing of items in a respectful and non-intrusive manner.
Encourage positive habits
Motivate your loved one to establish and maintain healthy habits, such as regular cleaning routines, reducing clutter, and avoiding acquiring unnecessary items.
Supporting a family member or friend struggling with hoarding requires patience, understanding, and empathy. By educating yourself, fostering open communication, encouraging professional help, establishing boundaries, and offering practical support, you can play a vital role in their journey towards recovery.
Remember to take care of yourself throughout this process, seeking support and guidance as needed. With your unwavering support, your loved one can begin to overcome the challenges of hoarding disorder and work towards creating a safe, clutter-free environment that promotes their well-being and quality of life.
When they are ready, cleaning out the home can be a daunting task, depending on how bad the hoarding got. It can also be a dangerous one. Call hoarding cleanup professionals like The BioClean Team. We know how to help safely and compassionately, and in situations like these – that’s often what’s needed the most.